"We need not be casualties of war but warriors wounded in battle who will heal and rise stronger than before. The promise of ever after, especially with our families, is that while the battles may never stop, neither will the victories."
I leaned over to my daughter's friend and whispered, "do you like my flowers?" She peeked past me to the bright bouquet on the table and nodded a timid yes. "My husband gave those to me...because I was mad at him." She looked at me and giggled. "I liked them so much I forgave him." I said. She gave me a weird look and kept eating potato chips.
My daughter had a her tonsils and adenoids out along with tubes put in. She was exceptionally needy and in pain and by the end of the week I was feeling burned out. My husband called me on his way home from work. As we spoke, he was not appeasing my desires and I shamefully admit that I hung up on him. I don't usually do things like that, but when I do it makes him really mad. I was expecting a few words when he came home, but was surprised by the vibrant sunflower bouquet. The minute I saw them I was already appreciating their beauty, and feeling a little guilty for my ornery nature. In fact I pretty much forgave him immediately.
I can't say I really deserved that bouquet as I was mostly the one being unreasonable, but my husband changed everything by giving it to me. Instead of being upset at me he loved me. Instead of arguing about who was right, wrong, or ornery he bought me flowers.
Every now and again we need a good reminder in the way we solve conflict. Next time you have a tiff with your spouse, instead of looking for a way to be right, look for the flowers. Find a way to forgive, show love, and relieve their burden. My husband knew I was tired, he knew I hadn't had a full nights rest for a week, neither had he, but he didn't use that as an excuse. He simply showed compassion. When conflict does arise the solution is rarely found in more conflict. It's usually found in love, patience and forgiveness.