Wednesday, March 20, 2013

If It's Important To Them I't's Important To Me

(Excerpt chap. 4)

I love it when my husband helps me with my creative projects, and he loves it when I go fishing with him. Neither of us loves the other’s hobby, but we love each other. We love making each other happy and we love being together. In order to show our loved ones that what is important to them is important to us, we must actually know what is important to them. I know it is important to my four-year-old to read her stories. I know it is important to listen to my nine-year-old and help her with creative projects. If we want to know what is important to our loved ones, it is important to pay attention, listen, and inquire. Sometimes, that means we have to stop doing what we are doing and refocus our attention on our family. There is no togetherness in families that are always doing their own thing separate from one another.

James, my brother and father of four boys, says, “I’m not a scouter. I haven’t been one since I was ten years old, and I actually have a great treasure trove of negative experiences, emotions, and memories to draw on to remind me why I don’t love scouting. Unfortunately, I’m the lucky father of four boys, and the ones who have experienced it love it. They love camping, hiking, biking, building, gaming, campfire-ing, and scouting in all its forms. I’ve slowly come to realize that while scouting can be great by itself, it’s much more effective, exciting, and enjoyable when boys can do it with their dads. In fact, only a handful of the scouts in the boys’ den even get that opportunity, coming mostly from single or uninvolved-parent homes, so I want to make sure my boys don’t miss out on the great joy that can come by doing these things together. I’ve attended meetings, helped them build, tolerated den leaders, stood up to misinformed authorities, gone to day camp three years in a row (so far) and had general great memories with my sons. I still don’t like the scouting, particularly, and I probably never will, but my sons will, and I'll be next to them while they do.”

It is exciting when someone is interested in you, your hobbies, and your passions. It is even better when that someone who is interested is someone you love.  Don’t blow off your family’s concerns or joys just because they seem unimportant to you. They are important to them. Life is made up of thousands of seemingly menial things that make up who we are, who we become, and what we believe. Our attitude toward the important things in our loved ones’ lives determines whether or not they feel loved and supported by us. 

Tune in with us Friday for a great guest post by Cherise Cooper!

1 comment:

  1. I think a key factor here is doing it selflessly. When done begrudgingly, it defeats the whole purpose. Learn and love with joy.