Moving With My Boys

As always I enjoy Friday posts because we get to hear other people's stories. Today I'm lucky to introduce Liz Hutchings. Mother of four boys, organizing queen, and professor of mathematics for various online colleges. She is ever busy doing wonderful things. Here is what she has to tell us about the recent transitions of her life.

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Hello everyone!  My name is Liz, and I am the mother of four boys!  For about three months now we have been in a transition stage.  What does that mean you may ask, well, let me tell you.  It means that we decided to buy a new house, which involved putting our house on the market, selling it ourselves, and then moving out.  We have yet to close on the new house, so we are currently living in a little rental house until we can move in.  So, for three months we have been moving from one transition to another around my house.  I had never sold a house before, and I learned very quickly that it is difficult and stressful for everyone.  Mom is trying to keep everything clean and organized.  Dad is trying to fix things up around the house after working all day.  The kids are trying to play with very few toys because mom put the rest of them in storage.  And now we are living in a much smaller house with most of our belongings in storage!  So, how do we deal with these transition times?   Here are some things that I found helpful.

First, we tried to involve the kids as much as we could, so they could feel apart of things and not just on the outside looking in.  When moving boxes and furniture that can be difficult but even the little ones can carry the lighter things.   Also, the children can help with the cleaning, and if nothing else they can hold the tape for you when you are packing.  One thing our kids liked was being able to help choose which toys got to stay out and which went into storage to see again at the new house.

Second, we had little family parties.  Now you have to understand that I am not very creative, so when I say family parties to me that can mean anything from watching a movie to playing a game to ordering pizza.  It may be something you normally do, but if you call it a party the kids will get excited and recognize that you are having fun with them!

Third, we communicated with our children.  Children like to know what to expect especially when things are crazy.  Every Sunday we would talk about the plans for the week, so they knew what mom and dad were doing and what was expected of them.  It is amazing how much more helpful children are when they know their help is needed or they know that if they work hard there will be a small party at the end of the week.  Kids also appreciate honesty.  I don’t like to tell my kids that I will be packing all day for a week, so I may not be able to play with them as much as I usually do, but knowing the truth and hearing my feelings about it really helped us to keep everyone talking to each other, supporting each other, and helping each other. 

Fourth, find time to have fun.  I am a very organized person with many lists that tell me what I need to do.  Sometimes I have to put on my list things like – play a game with Michael or read to Jacob.  I tried to pay attention to see what it was that each child needed and appreciated the most, so that when I had little snippets of time I made them count.   When you are moving there is very little time and sometimes no time at all but usually there was some time that we could take with each child.  My husband started taking a child out to lunch with him, so they could just go and talk.  I would play a game or read or go get a new toy car with them.  It was never a lot, but it was something that showed that we were there, that we love them and that we care enough to make time for them.

We are not done, yet, so we are still trying to apply these principles and hopefully perfect them, but I have seen that they help and that they work.  So, whatever stage of life or transition of life you are in find ways to show extra love, take extra time, and always communicate with your little ones, so you can all enjoy the journey cherish even those crazy times!  

Snowflakes With Grandma

Feeling a bit bored and in need of something out of the ordinary, we naturally settled into making snowflakes. Who doesn't love snowflakes in May? We pulled out different patterns of paper, hunted down the scissors, and started folding. My mom taught me to make star shaped snowflakes which I was especially excited about. It was fun, cheap, and full of creative opportunities. If you know any cool snowflake making techniques we would love to hear about it or see some pictures. Hope you had a lovely Memorial Day. Have fun making snowflakes.

It was definitely messy!

The options are endless in shape and size!

Obviously the coolest snowflake ever!

Happy Memorial Day

All Things Family is closed for Memorial Day Monday May 27th. It will reopen Wednesday May 29th.
Enjoy your families and eat something yummy!

It's Hard To Let Things Go

I'm excited to introduce my sister Marquie Walton. She is pursuing a fine arts degree at Brigham Young University as a Music major. She is incredibly smart and talented with a fresh new perspective. Here's what she has to say.
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Hey everyone! Thank you for taking the time to read this today! When Michelle asked me to do a guest blog, I reluctantly said yes. I figured I wouldn’t really have anything to say, but I didn’t have anything else to do with my time, either. Michelle said to write something about letting go. Immediately I thought, “what the heck, I have nothing to say”. Upon further search, I would like to share 2 examples with you on letting things go in my life.

I recently had my 1st anniversary. Woohoo! We made it a year. However, the first story took place while we were working on our decision to be married. I am very particular about the clothes I wear, and how people perceive me based on my clothes. Patrick, my husband, wears pants that are too short. He knows this, I know this, pretty much the whole world knows it now, and it drives me nuts. One morning, my dad and I went out to breakfast to talk about my feelings. I brought up the pants. They are just enough too short that it’s a wee bit awkward. I ranted about it for a few minutes, and my dad listened and said something very important. “Then break up with him.” WHAT?! That’s the stupidest thing I had ever heard. And I felt SO shallow. . . Cuz I was. But it bothered me so bad. Why was it such a big deal? It was shallow, but important to me, so it couldn’t go unresolved.  Basically what this had come down to was either I get over it and let it go, buck up and talk to Patrick, or break up. Break up over pants? Come on. But it was an option. And that’s when I realized it wasn’t really an option.

After that, I really realized they were only pants, talked about it a bit, and I moved on, but ensured his tux pants were long enough (for me) at our wedding. :) We still have discussions about the length of his pants, and his short pants still drive me berzerk.  However, upon discussion, I found out that it really isn’t that big of a deal to him to wear longer pants. He had gotten used to the clothes that he had shrunk in, (they were too big!), and he didn’t have the money to buy ones that fit well again. Patrick told me he likes to look nice, just like I do, and feels better when he dresses to fit, but also that there were more important things to do with his money. The thing that I’m trying to get across here is that this tiny tiny thing was made huge. Now, sometimes these tiny things are really important to you, and that is okay. Length of pants is important to me. I didn’t just dismiss it, but I dealt with it. I chose what was most important to me, and that was not the pants. It was our relationship. To this day I still tell him his pants are too short, and he smiles and fixes them. I let go of my annoyance just enough to let our relationship through, and Patrick let go of his short pants enough to deal with my constant nagging. We know we love each other, and our relationship comes first.

The second story is quick, I promise! As you already know, I care a lot about how other people perceive me based on my looks. Well, 3 days ago I had long, beautiful brown locks almost halfway down my back. 2 days ago, I went to the salon with my 9 year old niece, and we cut off our beautiful locks and donated them to Locks of Love. I initially did this because her mom was tired of her screaming every time she had to brush her hair. She said, “why don’t you donate your hair?” I was sitting there, and I said, “if you do it, I’ll do it!” What had I just said?! I had been planning to cut my hair, but NOT YET! I had to work up to it. I went back and forth, and then finally decided that I had told my niece that I would do it, and I wouldn’t go back on that. My long brown locks and her blonde ones are now chopped short to our chins in 2 cute bobs. I was on the verge of tears the night we did it, but it’s already growing on me. The important thing to me, was that I was able to let go of something that again, was rather superficial, but very important to me, to do something important. In this case, I didn’t go back on the promise I had made.

Looking back at these 2 stories, I feel kind of superficial, but these things can be applied to any situation, however deep or superficial. Figure out what is most important to you, no matter how hard the other may be to give up, and stick with it. My family is the most important thing to me, so that is what I choose.

Time to Swim

With memorial day weekend fast approaching and the sun finally shining I thought it was time for our first swim of the season. We had a blast and since the pools and water parks are opening we think you should get out the life jackets, floaties, or lemonade and go for a swim! Maybe some sprinkler running is appropriate. Tack on some outdoor games and a barbeque to the fun. I think we will be doing it again...and again...and again!

Letting it Go

I am not a super organized person as many of you may know but I really want to be. Really bad. I really want my house to be organized, I want to have my life organized and I want to have my family be organized. The problem is, I've realized that to get what I want I have to give some things up. Two things to be exact. The first is sleep and the second is stuff. And I have found that I'm really struggling to give either of them up. I like my morning rest and I think maybe I'm just not sure what to get rid of, but until I do these two things, I can't have what I really want. So, the question is why can't I let go to get what I really want?

 I read a story once about how racoons are captured. I can't be sure of its validity as I really know nothing about catching racoons but the principle is perfect. It taught that to catch a raccoon you simply make a cage with a small opening with food inside. The raccoon puts his paw into the hole to grab the food and the raccoon is caught, because when his fist is holding the food he can't pull his paw out of the trap. If he wants to be free all he has do is let go of the food, but he won't, and hence he is caught.

I think we all have these things in our lives. The things that are keeping us from what we really want. The things we hold onto that catch us, weigh us down, and keep us from attaining the happiness we desire. Some of us want to lose weight but just can't give up the food. Others want to breath better but they can't let the cigarettes go, still others want to get more done but can't stop checking Facebook. I want to get more done but I won't get up earlier or rid myself of extra stuff.

Lets kick it. Lets get rid of the things that keep us from what we really want. Lets start letting go.
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Just a heads up, I often do my posts in the afternoon hours because that is when my son takes a nap. If you check the blog Mon., Wed, or Fri. and you don't see a post check back a bit later, say around nap time.

Minute Votes

Today is a bit of a treat for me as our guest post will be from my husband Bryce. He is truly the love of my life and the man of my dreams (minus a few inches). He and I do not have a perfect life or perfect family but his hard work, his love and his willingness and desire to better himself, help to make our imperfect life a happy life. I've never known a better man. Bryce is the owner of Natural Power and Developing us. He works hard, plays hard and loves deeply. Here is what he says...

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I sit alone in my house without a sound of life around other than the tapping keys of my keyboard. I have a wife and four young kids, but I sit in silence. You see, I left on vacation with the lot of them in our van across the breadth of the United States to head to Virginia and Washington DC. It’s what is called a vacation, and the first vacation for our family since 2006. I then had to fly home to keep the business going and will fly back at a weeks end to travel back home in our van.

My father once told me that a real vacation is for two people and only two people; bring the kids and it becomes a journey with a whole lot of work. This vacation was not planned for years nor did we save up to go, we just found a moment in time where it worked and we left. Had our focus been on a vacation like this, we would have left years earlier. We chose a different course for those years (work, school, etc.), even though we hoped for what we have finally done now.

I am reminded of my economics class and the lesson on ‘Dollar Votes.’ Households or consumers decide what products will be on the shelf and which companies will live or shut down by purchasing their product. Each time we purchase something, it is a dollar vote for more of that product from that company. We can be careful in what we place our dollars toward or we can be nonchalant and throw our votes towards the first object to fit the fancy.

Have we ever thought of our time in the same way? Have we considered where we spent each minute and thought about the ‘minute votes’ we placed in our lives. If we love TV, guaranteed our minute votes would be given to it. If we loved our children, we would spend our minute votes in their realm, in their worlds.

Take a look around you for a second in whatever room you are in. Do you see worthwhile reminders of minute votes well spent? Do we fill our tables and walls with objects that have no “minute vote” value? Have we voted on the things we would consider to be most precious? Do other’s feel our votes towards them or are they towards objects without the capacity of emotional and loyal returns?

Whether political votes, dollar votes, or minute votes, the majority rules and life will mold it’s way to accommodate the majority. Let’s vote for family! Let’s vote for nighttime stories, let’s vote for holding hands everywhere we go with our spouse and children, let’s vote for dinners together at the table, let’s vote for the random vacation at the expense of ‘getting ahead’, let’s vote for those things that mean something and rid our lives of the emptiness of cold votes.

I sit alone, with my family across the nation, longing for this week to end so I can fly back and enjoy our time together again. Hoorah for minute votes well spent! They’re unforgettable.

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I miss you hon, thanks for the post!