So Tired. So Tired. So excited to shuffle off to bed and let the comfort of warm blankets and darkness envelop me. I climb into bed and realize I didn't write my blog. Oh so tired. Maybe I should just wait until tomorrow. Everyone who would read it is sleeping now. Or at least they should be. I think they are so tired too.
Sick kids, door decorations for teacher appreciation, dinner for a friend, babysit for a friend, babysit for a job, work on my new book, dash to the store, Junior Jazz basketball for Daniel, Activity for Ella, Church activity for me...at my house...cook more food. Oh so tired. The husband's working all night, giant untouched pile of laundry (which will most definitely remain untouched until morning), coach a basketball team, run suicides (or sweet sixteens, or ladders, or whatever you prefer to call them) with my team--absolutely crazy. Oh so tired. Worry about people I love, Clean the bathrooms--had to be done, too many loads of dishes, wash so much laundry, take a walk with a friend, help the kids with homework. Oh so tired!
So, when my son wanted me to fix his train tracks I sat down on the floor to help and realized "this floor is not going to get cleaned, and oh how it needs a good scrub" Discouragement. Bedtime arrives and the kid's homework isn't done. Discouragement. As the evening chaos hits I wonder, how can I get three people to the same place at the same time? Discouragement. The realization, "I never sent those emails." Discouragement. I don't think we should even mention the kids bedrooms. Way too much discouragement.
How can I keep up when everyday life makes me so tired?
One step at a time. One positive, "do your best Michelle" pep talk at a time. One, it's okay not to live all of life in one day, reminder at a time. One, it's good to wear yourself out doing what is important to you, reminder at a time. One deep breathe at a time. One silent prayer for help at a time. One reminder how great my life really is, at this time. One kiss and hug from the kids at a time.
Today, even though I'm tired, I can be better than yesterday, one positive, hopeful, active step at a time.
"We need not be casualties of war but warriors wounded in battle who will heal and rise stronger than before. The promise of ever after, especially with our families, is that while the battles may never stop, neither will the victories." (James Hutchings)
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Like Jewelry in Her Mouth!
My publishing company “Familius” Is filled to the brim
with wonderful people. Every day they send out what they call a Minute Inspiration—You should check out their web page it is full of great
things like this. Today I wanted to share the inspiration of David Miles. It
fits in perfectly with our better today than yesterday series. Enjoy.
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This year's winter is gearing up to be a tough one, and
if you've heard the phrase "Polar vortex" anytime in the last week or
two, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
We lived in Pennsylvania when I was a kid, and every so
often some moisture from the South would combine with artic air from Canada and
we'd have a classic Nor'easter: blowing winds, drifting snow, and no school!
For me and my six siblings, that meant a whole day to play, a
get-out-of-jail-free card—eight blissful hours of sledding, building, fortressing,
and putting off homework.
For Mom, of course, "no school!" meant seven
lunches to fix, seven missing boots to find, seven sets of wet footprints
trailing around the house, and, a few snowballs and lots of tears later, at
least one or two children to console. It meant a house full of hyperactive kids
and lots of unchecked boxes on her to-do list.
And that's the remarkable thing, because Mom never
seemed to mind. Snow days were a celebration! She made us pancakes in morning,
took pictures of our snowmen, and was just as excited when the Weather Channel
heralded another incoming storm.
In short, Mom could see things the way we did—and that's
a magical gift. If you saw the world through your child's eyes, what would you
see? Would their fears become more real to you? Their dreams more important?
Their accomplishments more triumphant?
It takes some doing to adopt the eyes of a child, but
the view down there is spectacular.
By David Miles, Familius Digital Director
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What does life look like through the eyes of my three year old when he can't get his train tracks together and everyone is too busy to help? I would imagine it's frustrating and hopeless. What does it look like to my ten year old when she fills the house until brimming with the magical music of Disney's Frozen while singing at the loudest decible possibly audible by man? It's total bliss! Every part of her small frame is energized and invincible. What does it look like through my eight year old's eyes as he opens a new bow and arrow for his birthday? It's so exciting and the possiblities are riveting. What does it look like through the eyes of my five year old when the dentist puts a silver cap on her tooth? It's scary. But what does it look like when she see's it in the mirror for the first time? It's beautiful that's what it is! Like jewelry in her mouth!
When we see through the eyes of a child, any child, we will undoubtedly
be better today than yesterday. Not only because kids seem to live on a lighter
and happier realm, but because we will have a better insight into their lives.
We will be better teachers, parents and grandparents, and happier people. This week make life better by seeing through the eyes of the children around you.
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Today...I Ran!
I ran. Like real running. Heart-pumping running. Okay more
like heart-pumping jogging. Either way I consider it a success! I know for many,
running is an everyday thing but I don’t
run. Ask anyone. I walk, hike, walk fast, ice skate, play volleyball, and
swim, but I don’t run. Why? Two years
ago in the midst of an intense workout my heart went crazy—palpitations and
arrhythmia! My blood pressure spiked, I had intense pain up through my shoulder
and neck and thought I was going to pass out. I did a little deep breathing,
put my head down, and started praying I wouldn’t drop right there. I got out of
there as fast as possible and I was scared!
Well here I am, two years and lots of tests and doctors
visits later. My friends keep pestering me to go back to the gym with them but
I just can’t do it, and finally I admitted my fears to them. I don’t want to have a heart attack. You should
know that that infamous workout wasn’t the cause of my heart problem just the
culmination of it’s manifestation. You should also know I am pretty healthy and
could have started running long ago—accept for the fear that grips me every
time I think about it.
I found myself on the treadmill this morning for my daily
walk, thinking to myself, “Just do it. Just run.” Of course my evil angel was
telling me to give it up before I even started. I only half listened, and I
selected the harder workout telling myself I could always slow down. But, when
the treadmill sped up so did I. I did it! I ran! For 5 minutes. Maybe not such
a big deal to some but to me it was a big deal. I did a hard thing, something I
feared. Even better than that, my kids watched me do it.
I know that my kids will become in some ways a reflection of
who I am. I want them to know that I can do hard things. I want them to know
that I faced my fears. I hope it will help them to have the courage to do the
hard things they fear. I hope they will try out for school plays even when they
don’t make it the first time. I hope they will practice the piano even when
they are not good at it. I hope they will try food they don’t like. I hope they
will play soccer again after they break their nose doing it.
You see, this post isn’t really about running. It’s about
doing something I was afraid to do. It’s about being better today than I was
yesterday.
Twenty -four years ago, we had a fire in our home that
stemmed from faulty wiring that had melted behind our fireplace. Once our home
was repaired and we had moved back in we did not have any fires in the
fireplace for what seemed to me a long while. I remember my Dad getting off the
couch one day in a bit of a whirl. He threw the ice bag he had been using at
the fireplace and walked out to the garage. A few minutes later we had a fire
in our fireplace. Big deal right? It was a big deal to him.
I know we all have our own demons, big or small. I challenge
you to pick just one and face it today or this week, even if it is for 5
minutes. Maybe those five minutes will be enough to light a fire in you. I will bet after doing so you will find
yourself better today than yesterday. And I will bet some day even if it is twenty-four
years from now your own children will remember and follow your example.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------Welcome to our new series: Better today than yesterday. Each
post for the next little while will focus on something we can do to be better
today than yesterday. I am a firm believer that one of the best things we can
do to improve our families is to be
better today than yesterday. I hope you enjoyed the first segment of our
series.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
One Day at a Time
The holidays have been good to my family and me. Wonderful
in fact, but for some reason, possibly lack of motivation, I find myself less
than enthused about new years resolutions this year. Maybe—with the kids home from school—my house
has been a mess for too long. Maybe all the holiday fun just wore me out. I’m
usually a very goal centered gal but history has shown that I am often failing
to meet or even get past the paper stage of my goals.
I would love to be softer spoken with my kids, more intimate
with my husband, and spend more one on one time with everyone in my family. I
would love to have a perfectly organized and clean home, finished and decorated
to match the dream in my mind. I would love to have the patience of a saint,
the knowledge to help my kids in all their struggles at school, with friends, and
with life, but I already know I will fall short of such perfection. After all,
a year is a long time to be perfect in so many areas—and I’ve only just begun.
Before you all start falling into a Michelle induced troubled and discouraged state, let me tell you about my redeeming moment today. I was talking
with a friend who confided her desire simply not to “lose it” with the kids.
She was trying so hard only to find herself feeling unappreciated and
disrespected. This of course is a hard thing for any parent. As she talked
through things with me she said, “We just have to take it one day at a time.”
Well it’s true! Life isn’t about eating the whole pie in one
sitting—or brownies if you prefer—it’s about enjoying it one bite, one piece
at a time. I don’t have to be “perfect” for a year, or even an entire day. New year’s
resolutions always fill me with the need to attain perfection within such a
small window of life. Perfection is a misleading word anyway. I would like to
redefine perfection from the idea of never making a mistake, to the reality of
simply working to be better than you were yesterday. I am still definitely a
believer in goal setting, but it seems a lot more doable when I take it one day
at a time.
What does all of this mean to me? It means that even though
yesterday I had a “my house is a disaster and no-one’s helping” breakdown,
today I can vacuum the floors, scrape up the food that’s leaching onto my tile,
and keep up with the laundry (I was shy of completion by one load—and a pile of
unfolded laundry on my couch). It means that even though I spent too much time
and energy cleaning this morning, I can do better spending time with Ella on
her homework tonight and more time reading with Julia. It means that even
though my husband hurt my feelings yesterday, today I can forgive, give him a
kiss and be happy. It means that when Jackson wipes curry all over my white
shirt at dinner I can be patient in that one moment—I think I did a pretty good
job. It means that when I get upset at the kids for arguing I can take the next
moment to apologize and teach them. One moment at a time, one day at a time,
working for a better me and a happier family.
Hmm, I think I’ve come up with my new years resolution. Enjoy life with us, one moment and one day at a time!
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I hope you all had a wonderful holiday season and I hope the new year brings great opportunity for hope and joy for you and your family. My blogs will now be posted on Tuesday's. Happy New Year!
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